Meet People Before You Judge Them

Welcome to the Limitless Mindset Podcast. My name is Blake Clark and I am the founder and visionary of Limitless Real Estate and also the team lead of the Clark team. My goal with this podcast is to show you that your possibilities are truly limitless with the right mindset and outlook on life. On this podcast, you're going to hear from not only myself but also other members within our brokerage, as well as my team, and we're going to be discussing all things real estate, mindset, goal setting and what it takes to build a good business and succeed in life. Thanks so much for joining us and welcome Alright guys.

Welcome to another episode of the Limitless Mindset Podcast. Another week gone behind us. Hopefully you guys had an absolutely incredible one and hopefully you guys had an absolutely productive one as well, too. While the market and the economy might be doing some weird things and not going in everyone's favor, I promise you guys there's opportunity out there if you guys really look for it and put into application things you guys learned on this podcast and from others out there. That rolls us right into the topic that I wanted to talk to you guys about today, and that is making sure that when you guys see people online, you're trying to avoid having negative feelings and impact on them based on what other people say and drawing conclusions until you guys actually meet these people. I was having a conversation today with somebody who's actually an agent that had come in and interviewed with our brokerage, and they had a conversation with me and they said it was kind of funny, you know, they'd see me online and they thought I was some arrogant jerk and things they had heard and things of that nature basically, and draw a lot of assumptions about me. And they said you know, the funny thing is, though, I never took the time to just come in and meet you for myself and draw my own conclusions, and it made me realize that, you know, I think that happens to a lot of us.

There's a lot of people online these days, a lot of big personalities, a lot of people out there doing big things, making big noise and big movement, and I think it's human nature for so many people to just draw assumptions about these people. You know, and you know, in some ways, unfortunately, some people fall into the hating mindset right. They see people out there absolutely killing it and doing good in life, and it's easy to just kind of cast a negative shadow on that person in your mind and think that they're a bad person or things of that nature. I could tell you, guys, I've even experienced some of this myself and my own ways when I was younger. You know it's hard not to you know, really, look at things through the right lens and think that you know you play the victim role and that everybody's doing something to get ahead. That's wrong and you're having a hard time and you do everything right.

And I could tell you, guys, this is something that is so wrong with society today is that we draw all these assumptions about people. We hear all these things online, we hear all these things from other people and we never make decisions based on our own experiences with people. You know, some of the best contacts I've ever made, guys and I'm really, really mean this or from people that I've met online people that other people would consider to be jerks or, you know, arrogant or all the names we get thrown out there, but in reality, these people have never actually met. The people that I've met that turned out to be absolutely incredible people, and I kind of discredit social media with this, or I should say, credit social media with this culture that we're in these days, where it's easy to just see somebody out there killing it and doing good and sharing their wins, and just allow people to hate on them right, without actually drawing an assumption. And again, I think that you guys you know if I could offer you any advice today, and the point of this podcast is, before you guys draw assumptions or conclusions about people, make sure you're taking the time to physically go meet these people. Maybe pick up the phone, have a conversation and normalize that process, rather than just utilizing the online platform is a way to just hate on somebody and their success. Some of the best people, like I said, I've met have been people online. Some of the knowledge that I have today has been people I've met online. This is one of the things that I love about social media is it's connected me with so many amazing people out there. Half the mentors that I know I met these people online. Half the friendships I have today, I've met these people online. It's a great tool that allows you to connect with people that you may not have ever ever connected with before. However, it's created this systematic call culture where people tend to just hate on other people. Right, it's easier just to point the finger and start critiquing and start putting these people down.

I got a DM from a gentleman the other day and I figured I'd share this on their just case in point. You know, he said he saw a picture of me, my Lamborghini and social media and he's like I got to be very honest with you, man. I drawn this conclusion that you were some arrogant asshole. You're buying a nice car on social media and some, whatever he goes. There's absolutely no reason to think that about you. I just automatically went to this mindset you were some jerk or some idiot, you know, and he goes. I started following you, though, ironically, and he goes. I love the content you put out. I actually find that it inspires me, it's motivating. You're always finding ways to give back and I've had the conversation with quite a few people that have seen me online and made these assumptions that I'm some jerk or whatever.

The reason may be right and I'm sure in some ways I probably do come across that way, self admittedly, but I always love it when people actually take the opportunity to pick up the phone and just have a conversation with me and, or you know, pull up a chair, come, hang out my office, have a conversation and really make a decision for yourself, if you still feel that way after meeting me in person, because I see this a lot with people that I know. I've got a lot of friends that are online. I got a lot of friends that are big personalities out, a lot of friends that are making big noise and business and killing it A lot of people that I personally look up to, and when somebody finds out that I'm friends with that person, one of the first things they say is all that person looks like a jerk, they come across as this way, they seem like they're arrogant and all these things right, and the conversation always stems around what they seem like and I'm sure they're this way, or somebody told me they were this way, and I always ask them well, have you personally met them? Have you personally pick up the phone? Have you personally gone and had an actual conversation with this person to draw your own conclusions right, or are you relying on secondhand conversation or you're relying on what somebody's cousin and sister told you down the road, right, like, actually take the time to build your own assumptions about these people? This again, guys, is one of the biggest qualms I have with culture today is that it's so easy to just cross people out right, draw lines through people, draw assumptions about people, and I really think that you guys are missing out, because I do believe that there's some absolutely incredible talent online these days.

A lot of the things that I love to learn from other people are things that I watch others do online. You know content that they share, knowledge that they tend to pass down, and I've had to really remove myself from the situation of drawing assumptions about people and paying attention to their messaging, right. What are their intentions? Or their intentions good and to genuinely help people, and things like that. And you can't help but really appreciate people when you step back and you take your thoughts of that person out of the picture and you just say is their content good? Are they putting out helpful information? Are they doing this with nothing out of you know return? Are they doing with no expectation? Are they genuinely just trying to help people? And I think when you guys shift your perspective and you start looking at people from that manner, you tend to stop looking at hating on other people for their success, right? And I can tell you that if you take a little more time to look at these people online, you know, actually build relationships with them.

Don't just take the hearsay word that you guys have heard from other people. Don't just draw assumptions from the way that you see them online or the way that they're doing, or, if they're sharing success, assume they're arrogant or ego driven or anything like that. Take the time to personally go have a conversation, pick up the phone, maybe even shoot them a DM or something like that, and take the time to really get to know an individual before you guys just write them off right, you're missing out on a lot of opportunity and, truth be told, if you guys go through life, you're really missing out on great relationships with people, because the odds of somebody showing up online that you've never met, you completely resonating with them and then determining that that person would be a great fit in your circle to follow is very much a shallow depth in looking at relationships, right, I think you really need to engage in a conversation, you need to ask questions, you need to sit down, you need to really pick their brain on different ways that you guys think about things to determine if you feel like they're a valid source of information that you're seeing online right. Maybe they are, maybe they're not, but you really need to take the time to judge that situation for yourself, rather than just seeing people online and drawing assumptions. It's super frustrating for me because I do know that there are amazing people out there that have great talents, that really are genuinely just trying to help people online. I would consider myself to be one of these people as well.

I put out free content all the time. I try to help other people. I don't believe in mediocrity. I don't believe in settling. I think that society as a whole right now is really trying to compress people. They make it hard for people to want to win and strive for it. There's this underlying message out there right now of just playing it small, playing it safe, being content, being happy. I personally just don't subscribe to that. I think that life is short.

I think that we were put here to build, create, to pass on knowledge, to share knowledge, to help other people, to lift up in the form of a community by doing this. This is my way of giving back to other people and just simply sharing, from my perspective and my world and the things that I've learned. Here's what I've done to get ahead. This is one of those things. Right here, I can tell you that I had to get over this hump of just drawing assumptions about people, especially as a brokerage owner, a business owner. Whenever somebody comes in, I could always hear, oh, I've met this person, I heard their jerk, they're this, this. And I've really had to set that aside and choose my own thought process right by sitting down and actually interviewing somebody or having a conversation with somebody or drawing my own assumptions about that people, because I've had this happen many times where somebody told me so and so about one of agents, right. Where somebody told me so and so about a potential client or anything like that. We're a colleague and when I sat down, I've actually had a completely different opinion of them. I think they're an absolutely great person. Maybe they had a bad situation with one individual and I didn't want to tarnish that by just assuming that that person was correct, right.

So take the time these days, guys, whether you guys are in business personalized friendships, relationships shut out the noise. Don't listen to what other people are saying. Don't just take it face value what you guys are seeing online by an individual. Actually take the time to have a communication with somebody before you draw that conclusion about them, because you just might be missing out on absolutely incredible information. There are tons of great people out there that really are credible, really have built incredible things and really are online just trying to pass information and knowledge around there in an effort to help people, and if that knowledge is shadowed by your opinion or assumption of that person online, you might be missing out on some great messaging. You might be missing out on some great tips and tricks and things of that nature to help you guys in life and in business.

So, for what it's worth today, if you find yourself online, you know judging people, making assumptions about people, hating on people because they're showing a little bit of success, I would really stop and question yourself and say have they done anything? Have I actually had a conversation with them? Have they displayed anything that actually shows any validity to my personal assumptions about this person? Or have I even had a conversation? Or am I just drawing all of these random conclusions based on something that I saw online or something that I heard, instead of using my own logic and my own judgment after having a conversation with this person or meeting this person and then drawing right, and I think that you guys will find that when you do this, you'll actually get some great information. You'll get some great knowledge. You'll probably be pretty self aware in some areas that, wow, I made a completely wrong assumption about that person. They were actually really cool, they're a great person, they're actually really nice, right? So Give yourself a little grace with this.

Today, as you guys are flipping through social media and you start to see your mind wander of like, oh, that person looks like a jerk. I don't like this. Ask yourself why. Why am I thinking this way? What about this situation is making me assume this? And then, secondly, play devil's advocate with yourself in your own mind. Say, you know what? Let me listen to their messaging. Is there some truth in here? Is there some value in here? Is there something that I could probably actually use in my own business? Right, it's free advice, guys. It's on the internet Doesn't always mean all of it is credible.

You're going to need to do your homework and you're going to need to decide if the lessons that you guys are being taught by some people online, if they're actually credible in your own personal life, are applicable. But I would ask yourself this right. Start being self aware of. Why are you judging people online so harshly in the way that you are? Why are you making assumptions the way that you are? And are you giving that analysis a fair chance by actually having true conversations? You just might find you might have some actual true quality and talent right in front of you, trying to help you guys out that you're not allowing into your world because you're drawing these assumptions on them, where, in reality, if you take the time to get to know them, they might just work out to be a great ally of yours. Right, it might be somebody that you would have never thought you'd be working with before, but because they're actually really good at what it is that they do and you set your difference or assumptions aside and you get to know them, now there's somebody you can work closely with Now they're actually somebody that can help you within your business, your personal life, your friendships, your relationships, because you were blocking that potential person from coming in. So hopefully this is helpful to you guys.

I just wanted to share a little off the cuff, a little random, I know, but I see this a lot and I've noticed it online, where people are just trying to put good content out there. They're trying to be helpful. They're trying to help others and people are just blatantly hating on them for no reason, without actually taking the time to get to know these individuals and draw their own assumptions. So if you're one of these people, check yourself. Take a look in the mirror, ask yourself why you're doing this for people, ask yourself if you're giving it a fair chance, re-evaluate what it is you're doing. And if you have a negative thought about somebody, I'll tell you what I'm going to challenge you to do the hard thing and actually shoot that person a message, engage in a conversation with them, see how they respond, see if there's actually more commonality there between what you're actually assuming about that person, and let me know how it goes. I guarantee you your guys' relationships will go up. I guarantee you that your online experience will go up, because you're not just hating on everybody. You're actually finding value in some of the messaging that's being put out there by these people, and I really do think that your guys' quality of life will elevate because now you are, instead of blocking potential great things coming into your life, you're actually being open to receiving some of it through your own judgments.

As always, hopefully you guys have an absolutely amazing week. Hopefully you guys are out there killing it. Make sure you guys are out there. Let's crush it. If you guys found value in today's episode, I ask that you guys share this with anybody that you think may benefit from hearing this. Obviously, I do this for free. I do this to help you guys. I do this to help, obviously, impact other people that are looking to grow and scale and improve their life. So all I ask is that you guys do share this with somebody that you think it could help and benefit. I greatly appreciate it.